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My Testimony

Here's the story of my path to faith...

I remember my cousin Stacey telling me about Heaven and Hell. She told me I would go to Hell if I didn't "get saved." Hell sounded pretty bad, so I decided to choose, Heaven.

So I went to Church with Stacey Sunday and "got saved." I knew that when I died, I would go to Heaven.

We began going to Church as a family when I was around 8. For years I went to Church, and considered myself to be "saved."

I was a "good girl" at Church and at home, but at school I was just like everyone else at Church. I was horrible hypocrite. I never got involved with drugs,sex, gangs, or anything like that. I was just a mean person. I had a bad attitude and I cared little for others.

Moving to Gastonia was a huge change in my life. I had gone to the same school with the same people since 3rd grade, so I knew everyone and was pretty popular. It hurt to transfer to a place where I knew no one and no one wanted to know me.

Over the course of 3 years I suffered from depression and mild schizophrenia. Doctors put me on medication, but I only got worse. I was in and out of the psychiatric ward at least once a month for 3 consecutive months. I was hospitalized 5 times in 2 years.

The last time I was at the hospital, I remember just giving up and saying "Lord! I'm sick of doing things my way. I want to live life your way..." I just sat in my hospital room and cried out to the Lord all the pain and hurt I had inside.

When I left the hospital it took me about three more years to try and figure out why I was there in the first place. I now know. I was never truly saved. Yeah, I knew all the Bible stories, sat in Church about 3 times a week. I knew Jesus but I didn't know Jesus. I had a head knowledge of who Jesus was, but there was nothing in my heart for Him.

When I was discharge the last time (from the ward) they told me I would need medication and outpatient counseling. After two weeks, I stopped taking my medicine, an I have yet to go to a Counselor. God healed me. He decided that He didn't want this "thorn" to stay in my flesh, so He took it away. I no longer hear voices. I get sad, but not depressed.

I accepted Jesus and He is continuing to do great thing in my life. I just had to submit to Him and His will. My life is not my own, it all belongs to Him. I've been serving the Lord faithfully for about a year now (that's how long I've been a Christian). I have a different "thorn" that I pray will get taken away. But my "thorn" keeps me level headed. It keeps me from getting proud. I realize that I'm not perfect and that Jesus still loves me anyway.

That's what makes God God. He can look past all the things we've done. When we accept Jesus and repent of our sins, He no longer sees our sin. When He looks at us He sees Jesus. I thank God that He sent Jesus down to die for my sins.  I violated God's law and He forgave me.

Want to get saved?  Go to http://www.needgod.com.